Asheville Anniversary trip

We snuck away for a couple days and had the best time in the mountains.  I am not sure what has happened but I think I might be changing from a beach person to a mountain person...

10 year anniversary photo shoot

Spence and I celebrated our 10th anniversary on the 9th of July.  The weekend before, my cousin Kristin snapped some pictures of our family to honor the occasion.  I actually put my wedding dress back on and had Spence suit up.  We headed to my parents farm because they have the best places to take pictures.  It's just beautiful there.  Here are my favorite pics from that day:

TOP TEN

Today is 10 years that we have been married.  I have had the honor to love this man for more of my life than I haven't.  I love the beautiful mess of a life we have created together.  And I feel so blessed to walk through everything together.

  

Here is a top ten of our first ten years of marriage:

*we have lived in 4 homes 

*we have 4 awesome kids

*Spence earned one grad degree

*we still dream big together 

*we have only both worked full time at the same time for a year and a half total- the first year of our marriage and then for 6 months before Zeke was born 

*Spence wrote a book

*we have loved and grieved Rae's death

*I am taking us on a crazy hippy oil journey

*we have dated each other the entire time

*we both worked on staff at the church

selfie from our anniversary photo shoot

Anniversary date night 

(chocolate chess pie from Angus Barn is my jam!)

staff retreat 2013

Spence, Haddie and I got to get away for staff retreat for a few days.  It is so so great to get together with the other staff and their wives and reconnect.  I love getting to meet newer wives to staff and seeing ones that go to a different campus so I don't get to spend much time with them.  It was so bittersweet this year because our church planting residents finished out their year with the retreat.  We had a sweet time praying over them and their wives (if they were there).  We also got to hear from the man who planted our church over 50 years ago.  He has such an incredible story and I loved hearing him talk about planting, leaving and serving in Vietnam for the majority of his career, and just sharing about his life in general.  

Haddie loves snuggles with Danny

She made some sweet new baby friends

Spence thought I would go with him to the top of the mountain.  Clearly, he forgot who he married.  But I was super proud when he sent me this pic of him from the top!

This girl

The residents

New camera

Before Disney, we decided to get a new camera.  We decided to go ahead and splurge and get a nice one.  We were choosing between two and I left it up to Spence.  I am so happy I did because he definitely got the better one!  I am loving learning it and loving the pictures I can capture with the fact it can take 10 pictures a second or something ridiculous like that.  No more missed smiles or closed eyes, right? ;)

 

 

8 years

July 9, 2004 Spence and I got married after 6 years of dating.  This being our 8th anniversary means we made it through the dreaded 7 year itch.  Having 14 years together, I feel that we have learned quite a bit.  We literally have grown up together.  I mean, the guy still had braces and I still had bangs.  Babies, people, we were babies!  We have not only learned a lot about each other, and still do, but we have learned some stuff about relationships and marriage in general. 
So, here for you are 8 tips for making it through the 7 year itch (these are actually some things that we talk to engaged couples about when we mentor.  Yes we are so good at being married, we tutor others in it.  KIDDING!)

• It's actually ok to go to bed with out resolving a fight.  I know, I know, some people will argue with me.  But I am right here.  I am one of "those people".  You know the kind who in the heat will say something completely ugly and inapporpriate most likely bringing up something from years ago in order to hurt the other person. (Just keeping it real people) Spencer and I have found that it is better to let us (ahem, me) cool down and then we can talk things out rationally
• Do not try to have a hundred dollar conversation in a dime moment.  What does that mean?  It means that the time to discuss having another child, moving somewhere, budgets, or anything else that is big is not as one of you is walking out the door. Spence and I have gotten in the habit of scheduling times to talk about big stuff.  Trust me, it will save you from having some fights
• Do not under any circumstances talk badly about your spouse to others.  If you hang around people who bash their significant other, you may want to find new friends.  You need to surround yourself with people who will walk alongside you and encourage your marriage even in the hard times.  You should have some trusted friends that you can go to when you and your better half are on the outs.  These friends should point you to Christ instead of pointing at your honey
• Have fun together.  I realize sometimes we get into a rut.  We are tired people and tend to collapse after the marathon of dinner/bath/bedime.  We get on edge and need to get back to having fun instead of just vegging out and killing brain cells with tv.  Plan date nights, hang out with other couples, laugh together, but you have to plan this stuff.  I doesn't just happen
• Continue to study each other.  What made me tick when I was 16 is different from what makes me at 30.  Having children has changed what I value and how I am best shown love.  I have always loved sleep, but now... Spence letting me sleep in is speaking my love language! Keep working to show each other new ways that you love the other still.
• Reflect on the good and the bad and the normal.  Spence and I take our anniversary each year to talk about the top good and bad from the previous year.  It seems at times that it is easier to remember the hard or bad thing that happened over the last year.  But it is also really good to remember the everyday.  I don't want to only remember the highest of highs and lowest of lows.  I want to remember our normals, probably things I take for granted each day: how excited I am when he gets home each day, playing music while cooking dinner and dancing in the kitchen, making ice cream runs after the kids go down. 
• Pray for each other.  Not just little thrown up prayers, but real stuff.  I pray for Spencer about his integrity, his job, his time with the Lord, his leadership, his parenting and so much more.  Spend real time praying over your spouse and also for your relationship.  Praying has helped me so much when Spence and I aren't seeing eye to eye.  Not in a "please God change Spence on this", but in a real seeking the Lord way.  Most often I am changed through this time and not only is my relationship with Spencer better but my heart for God is strengthened as well
• Assume your spouse has your back.  Instead of jumping to conclusions or feeling selfish, assume the best of your other half.  When things don't come out the way your thought, don't think that the other person did it to you on purpose.  Instead think that it was an accident or a mistake.  This will help many arguments.  Show each other grace.  We have been forgiven much, so how can we not forgive?

OK, so we do not have these down perfectly.  We are still working on them and will continue to do so.  I do know that these past 8 years of marriage have been the hardest, but best of my life. I love living life with you Spencer.  Thank you for choosing me.  Love you babe!

Arrowhead Inn

For our anniversary Spence and I went to the Arrowhead Inn for a night. It is gorgeous and amazing. Phil and Gloria are adorable and so accomodating. Our room was wonderful and breakfast was fabulous. If you need a place to get away, definitely check it out.

So pretty!

I would love to come back in the winter and put the fireplace to use.

HUUUUUGE bathtub

Steam shower

7

Today we celebrate 7 years of being married. The second happiest day of my life was July 9, 2004. (the first being the day I gave my life to Christ) Our life looks very different from what I thought that day, but it is filled with more than I ever imagined. In honor of our 7 years, here is a list of seven things I love about Spencer.

1. He is the first person I want to see in the morning and the last person I want to see before I got to bed.
2. He is the most fun person I have ever been around.
3. He encourages me in every way, with the boys, with my cooking/keeping home, being his wife, my walk with Christ.
4. He is great at his job. Like really great. He has such a passion for making disciples of Christ. He has been shown great blessings in the area of small groups. This past year, he has spoken at a few conferences, counseled many other churches on their small group ministry, and written two small groups studies that will be published and sold by Lifeway in the fall.
5. He is an amazing dad. He gets up with our boys every.single.morning. Really? Who does that and lets their wife sleep another hour and a half (because our sweet Ben is an early riser)
6. He makes so many sacrifices for our family. He works really hard so that I can stay home with our boys.
7. The man gets HOTTER every stinking year. I mean when we met (at 15 and 16 years old, yeah, we have been together for 13 years. Go ahead "awwww") he was A-D--O-R-A-B-L-E. When we got married I thought he was handsome of course. But now... holy moly girls I got a good one!

Spence, I love you and I am so blessed by the life that we have together. I know that there are days when I am not as thankful as I should be, but please know that I love you and our life so much. You are my most favorite person. I love you always and forever.

Date Night

Spence and I have been a bit lax about our date nights for the last two months. I decided November we were going to start off with a bang. November is my turn to plan. I chose a RED theme to our date. We ate at RED Bowl in Cary (we had a livingsocial deal ,yay). We are currently reading through 10 Great Dates to Energize Your Marriage. (We got engaged while reading through 10 Great Dates Before You Say I Do)This was date one. It was really fun to talk about our dating days and our early days of marriage. We also discussed what we think is great in our marriage and what we think we could work on. Dinner went by quickly reminiscing. Afterwards, I gave Spencer an envelope with a scavenger hunt to find RED items. He had to do this in 30 minutes and document with pictures. He chose to go to Harris Teeter. On the inside, I was laughing at him because I just knew there was no way he could do it. 2 minutes and 20 seconds later, we stop the timer and have these memories:

RED car

Sign with RED letters

Something RED to eat

RED flowers

RED shirt (yeah, he had to ask that guy to pose with him, hehe)

Wilmington Weekend

Spence and I celebrated our anniversary 3 months delayed this year. We chose Wilmington because we were already going to a wedding there. We got some great recommendations, booked our hotel, sent the kids to my parents (small cryfest when that happened), and headed out. We got into town in time to have dinner at Osteria Cicchetti. O.H M.Y. W.O.R.D.!!!! I wanted to wrap that place up and bring it home with me. I had chicken parmesean and Spence had lasagna. Yummy deliciousness! Then we walked around downtown. Enjoying drinks and dessert at Trebenzios. We split a chocolate orange truffle cake, it made me want to slap Spence and the waitress it was so good! For breakfast on Saturday we hit up Sweet and Savory where I enjoyed the best french toast known to man. (it was so good we went there again on Sunday). Saturday night we got to go to the wedding of my friend from Meredith, Shannon. It was on the beach and beautiful. We had a blast hanging with my big sis's Melissa and Lindsay and their husbands Reade and Dan and even convinced them to join us for breakfast the next morning. After breakfast Sunday morning, we headed to Port City Community Church. We enjoyed a tour, service and lunch with the guy who is their Spence. I can't remember the name of the place, but it was down near the beach and we got to eat outside. We were so blessed by this trip, but were so excited to get home to our boys. I squeezed them tight when I got my hands on them. Ben was especially sweet by touching my face and just staring and Zeke just immediately said "Mommy, Dada, let's go!" and was ready to head home. It was great to get a way but really nice having them to come home to.
Here are the only picture we have from the weekend:

My love and I on the beach after the wedding

Melissa and Reade

Lindsay and Dan

The whole group

6 and 6

Spencer and I dated for six years before we got married. As of today, we have been married for six years. I want to tell you my top 6 reasons for why Spencer is the best husband and then share some pictures from each year of our relationship.

1. He is a man of God. This man strives to be like Jesus each day. He is truly the feet to the Lord each day with his job. He desires for people to grow closer in their knowledge of God and to do that through the community of their local body of believers. Those of you at the Summit know that his greatest joy is plugging people in and getting them connected into a great small group.

2. He is a servant for me and our family. He puts me before himself constantly. This wonderful man gets up every single morning with our boys and lets me sleep generally another hour and a half.

3. He works extremely hard outside the home as well. He loves the Lord and desires for others to know Him intimately as well.

4. He is a fabulous father. He adores our boys. They are truly his best friends and he loves hanging out with them. Some dads are just in the same room with their kids, not Spence. He is down on the floor with both of them crawling all over them. He teaches them about sports, gardening, God, and so much more. He walks through the door after work, ready to take over and jumps right in to my aid most days.

5. He is a lifelong learner. This is huge for me. He is constantly reading something and talking about it with me. I love that even after all this time we still have so much to talk about.

6. He forgives me easily. He never holds a grudge and quickly offers forgiveness to me. Trust me that in the past two years this has been especially wonderful.

7. He is my very best friend. There is absolutely no one else I would rather hang out with. I look forward to when he gets home just because I miss him during the day. There is no one else in the world that I would want to be walking through life with than him. I am beyond honored to be called Spence's wife and to share the title of Ben and Zeke's parents with him.

NOW to the pictures:

1999

2000

2001

2002

2003
June 18, 2003- the night we got engaged!
July 9, 2004

2005

2006

2007

2008

2009

2010